33: Shea Hillenbrand
“And I start crying, and I’m shooting [the ball] and they’re slapping me and suddenly, I couldn’t take it anymore. And as I run inside the house, my father yells after me, ‘go inside, you freaking baby!’”
From the Episode
About Shea
When Shea was in Mrs. Murphy’s fifth grade class, he raised his hand to share his two dreams: playing Major League Baseball and owning a zoo. The class laughed at him and as he put his hand down, he vowed to prove them wrong.
The summer before his sophomore year in high school, Shea’s family moved from SoCal to Arizona. Guess when is not a good time to move a kid to a new city? And so, Shea struggled – with his self esteem, his confidence, and his relationship with his father. Thankfully, he found comfort in sports. He excelled in soccer and became Arizona’s top ranked player, but none of that was good enough for his dad.
Meanwhile, Shea did whatever it took to make his MLB dreams a reality, walking onto a community college team and eventually securing a spot and becoming Arizona’s top junior college baseball player after his sophomore season.
Shea was obsessed with baseball. As a young Dodger fan in the 80s, he remembers the crack of the bat, the freshly cut grass, the roar of the crowd. But he also imagined himself in the batter’s box as thousands called his name.
The difference between Shea and the countless kids obsessed with ball games?
On Opening Day 2001, Shea took the field at Fenway Park as the Boston Red Sox starting third baseman. And with the national anthem blaring over the speakers, Shea remembered that determined fifth grader in Mrs. Murphy’s class as tears streamed down his face.
He’d made it. But as the seasons passed, he realized that he was playing the game for the wrong reasons, and he still didn’t have his father’s approval. And after seven years, he could take it no longer and he walked away. From his childhood dream, from $50 million, and from the life he thought he’d always wanted.
Shea turned his attention to his second dream, buying a 38 acre horse farm for $6 million and filling it with 300 farm and exotic animals. As the business grew and countless children laughed away the days in the petting zoo, Shea thought that this is what he’d been searching for. But again, fulfillment eluded him.
And so, one night, he found himself in a white van parked outside his house, with a bottle of vodka and pills, staring down the only way out he knew would be absolute. As his kids slept in their beds, proud of their baseball playing dad, he chased the pills with the vodka and let go.
Luckily for Shea and many others, he woke up the next morning to the sun shining down on him through the windshield. He was alive, although with one hell of a hangover.
Shea took it as a sign. Slowly, painfully, one little win at a time, he started to take control of his life. As his momentum built, he met his wife Kristen, redefined his identity, and transformed himself to seek fulfillment from the inside, realizing that if he’s not good enough for himself, he’ll never be good enough for anyone else.
It’s an ongoing process, but Shea is relentless. See, it was never about baseball or even the zoo. It had been about Shea, all along. On the other side of the abyss, Shea has embraced his mission of helping others through their own emotional turmoil, and he’s never been happier.
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Max Chopovsky:
This is Moral of the Story, interesting people telling their favorite short stories and then breaking them down to understand what makes them so good. I'm your host, Max Chopovsky. Today's guest is Shea Hillenbrand, whose story is the kind of roller coaster ride that movies are based on. When Shea was in Mrs. Murphy's fifth grade class, he raised his hand to share his two dreams, playing major league baseball and owning a zoo. The class laughed at him, and as he put his hand down, he vowed to prove them wrong. The summer before his sophomore year in high school, Shea's family moved from SoCal to Arizona. Guess when is not a good time to move a kid to a new city? And so, Shea struggled with his self-esteem, his confidence, and his relationship with his father. Thankfully, he found comfort in sports. He excelled in soccer and became Arizona's top ranked player, but none of that was good enough for his dad. Meanwhile, Shea did whatever it took to make his MLB dreams a reality, walking onto a community college team and eventually securing a spot and becoming Arizona's top junior college baseball player after his sophomore season. Shea was obsessed with baseball as a young Dodger fan in the eighties. He remembers the crack of the bat, the freshly cut grass, the roar of the crowd, but he also imagined himself in the batter's box as thousands called his name. The difference between Shea and the countless kids obsessed with ball games. On opening day 2001, Shea took the field at Fenway Park as the Boston Red Sox starting third baseman. And with the national anthem blaring over the speakers, Shea remembered that determined fifth grader in Mrs. Murphy's class as tears streamed down his face. He'd made it. But as the seasons passed, he realized that he was playing the game for all the wrong reasons and he still didn't have his father's approval. And so after seven years, he could take it no longer. And he walked away from his childhood dream from $50 million. And from the life he thought he'd always wanted. Shea then turned his attention to a second dream, buying a 38 acre horse farm for $6 million and filling it with 300 farm and exotic animals. As the business grew and countless children laughed away the days in the petting zoo, Shea thought that this is what he'd been searching for. But again, fulfillment eluded him. And so one night he found himself in a white van parked outside his house with a bottle of vodka and pills staring down the only way that he knew would be absolute as his kids slept in their beds, proud of their race ball playing dad. He chased the pills with the vodka and let go. Luckily for Shea and many others, he woke up the next morning to the sun shining down on him through the windshield. He was alive, although with one hell of a hangover. Shea took it as a sign, slowly, painfully, one little win at a time, he started to take control of his life. And as his momentum built, he met his wife, Kristin, redefined his identity and transformed himself to seek fulfillment from the inside, realizing that if he's not good enough for himself, he'll never be good enough for anyone else. It's an ongoing process, but Shea is relentless. See, it was never about baseball or even the zoo. It had been about Shea all along. On the other side of the abyss, Shea has embraced his mission of helping others through their own emotional turmoil, and he's never been happier. Shea, welcome to the show, brother.
Shea Hillenbrand:
Thank you so much. It's extremely emotional, man. Being able to relive that and your soothing voice and you have a gift. And I appreciate you sharing it the way you did the articulation and being able to give your audience a little bit of insight of my journey in life and where I am right now.
Max Chopovsky:
Thanks,
Shea Hillenbrand:
So
Max Chopovsky:
man.
Shea Hillenbrand:
thank you.
Max Chopovsky:
Thank you. I'm just summarizing. You're the one that lived it. So thank you. Now you're here to tell us a story. Is there anything that we should know before we get started? Do you wanna set the stage at all?
Shea Hillenbrand:
It's one of those things to where I, like so many men out there, would live in quiet desperation. And regardless of what you do on the outside, the accomplishments, the achievements, the levels of status, the success, the monetary, the money, whatever that might be, you're going to be I find it so common for so many people to be living in a space, especially men, in quiet desperation. And I have two older brothers, and my father has a generation, had a generational curse that took him over. and ultimately took his life six years ago with the struggles and the pain that he had to go through to be able to just keep his head above water from the internal turmoil and the stuff he dealt with his whole life for 76 years. So looking back. I've been able to. rewrite history. And that's my mission here today and my hopes with the end goal of being able to have the listeners or the viewers, your audience, to be able to see and understand that we have the power. We have the remote. We have the ability to rewrite that script, rewrite that transcript, rewrite that story, that narrative, that movie that we have playing over in our head over and over and over again every single day, stemming from experiences in our life.
Max Chopovsky:
That's powerful,
Shea Hillenbrand:
I didn't
Max Chopovsky:
man.
Shea Hillenbrand:
know I'd be this way. So it's cool, man. I appreciate this.
Max Chopovsky:
All right, well,
Shea Hillenbrand:
It's a great
Max Chopovsky:
let's
Shea Hillenbrand:
platform.
Max Chopovsky:
get into it. Tell me a story.
Shea Hillenbrand:
I remember eating supper really quick. I guess I call it supper. I don't know why I call it supper because I grew up in Southern California, but my mom grew up in Missouri, so she called it supper. And I just eat as fast as I could because I knew after dinner I would be going outside. Either on the basketball court in our driveway or off the batter's tee in the backyard or on the side of the house, kicking a soccer ball, something to get me going and keeping me moving every single day as I was growing up and through my adolescence and through my high school years. But this one particular day is a day when I'm 11 years old. And we would always eat dinner as a family. And that's one thing I always cherished. I think that's falling by the wayside now with families nowadays is we don't really realize the importance and the value of having dinner together as a family. So we always would do that. And after dinner, I would scarf my food down and then the nights that we'd have meatloaf, I would absolutely hated my mom's meatloaf. But if you don't finish your food, you can't go outside and play. Preface the story, I want your viewers and your listeners to understand that I would never listen to music. I never listened to, I never watched TV. Matter of fact, I didn't listen to music till I was 14 years old. And at 14 years old, I came across a band called Milli Vanilli. And their hit song is. Blame it on the rain. And I would always just some way somehow that would just really get me into a mood to go out there and take the next step. But I didn't realize that the band didn't even play their own songs.
Max Chopovsky:
Yeah.
Shea Hillenbrand:
They're using other people's songs and other people's voices, all that stuff. So I don't know what it was. There was something inside myself that drove me to not sit around and go out. And. I'd find myself lost in the Presence and in the shuffle of of mastering the skill sets of playing sports and when I figured out that I was doing that that Alleviated all the internal hell that I was going through the pain the turmoil The the trying to articulate those feelings and what I was going through and understanding that you know what I I don't feel Like I fit in I don't feel like I'm better than anybody else because I definitely don't feel that or didn't feel that but I'd never Felt like I fit in so it's really difficult for myself Okay, where can I fit in I could fit in in a space of sports? because I was athletically, I don't know if I could say gifted, but I was a little bit better than other players. I was a little bit better than my comrades and a little bit better than my classmates. So this one day after dinner, I was, hey, dad, do you want to go out front and play basketball? And like I said, I have two older brothers. I have one brother, Eric, who's four years older than me. And I have an older brother, Brian, who's six years older than me. So I was the baby. And I was the ultimate competitive person. I was the kid that came home after Little League and nine years old and to be mad in the car and my mom was like, what's wrong with you, Shea? You guys won. And I say, mom, you don't get it. The other players on my team, if they just tried, if they just gave effort, might give us a chance to win. Like, we're not winning because they're not trying as hard. They don't care. So trying to articulate those feelings and those emotions and that perspective and that outlook on life to where... at nine years old, 10 years old, 11 years old, not having that support to be able to articulate that wasn't a common thread in our household. So I asked my dad to go play basketball and we go out front. And we're playing basketball in the driveway and it's just my dad and myself. And I see my little brother Eric, who now is six, four and a half, and my oldest brother, Brian, coming out of the garage door from the kitchen. through the garage out to the basketball court. And we're all, they're all like, oh, let's play a two on two. And I'm like, oh my gosh, now I'm not gonna be able to compete. I can't understand, they're older than me. I can't keep up with them. All these thoughts are going through my mind. And as we proceed to play this game, and just a game after supper in the driveway, it was my dad and myself against my two older brothers. And I couldn't shoot the ball. I couldn't pass the ball. They were so far advanced than I was because they were older. And every time I went to shoot the ball, my old my middle brother, Eric, would swap the ball on my face. Or if I go to pass the ball, they intercepted it because I'm 11 years old. And it was no holds barred. Right. So I believe, but between the three brothers, my two older brothers and myself, the three kids, I think we're all vying for attention from my father to try to say, you know what, I'm good enough. Did you see that? I'm good enough in your eyes. Aren't I? And My father was never really in that place to be able to see that because his perspective of how he viewed the world was jaded from the stuff that he was going through the internal turmoil that he was experiencing. So long story short, halfway through the game, we're playing to 11, we get to six or seven, and I just. had enough. I'm overwhelmed emotionally. I'm so competitive and I'm getting defeated and defeated, defeated. The ball slapped in my face and my brothers mimicking me and they're making fun of me and all these things are going through and I'm an 11 year old boy that's extremely
Max Chopovsky:
Okay.
Shea Hillenbrand:
emotional, extremely passionate, extremely energetic, extremely... competitive and I start crying and I start crying and I'm shooting the ball and my brother's slapping my face and they're making fun of me and after two more shots I just had enough I could I had to escape I had to move I had to go and I just run through I just run through the garage and I just run into the house and I'm running into the house my father says go inside you fucking baby go inside grow up and as I'm going in there and I'm going to slam the door and he says take off all your clothes and go to your room. And I go to my room crying and I'm going to the kitchen and my mom's cleaning the dishes like a like a traditional family in the 1980s and and my my bedroom was off the family room just off the kitchen and I go in my room and I Slam my door and I'm just crying for a few sleep I mean, I can't even catch my my breath and and I can't get anybody to understand to support me and I'm sitting there without any clothes on in my room and and you know sitting in the middle of the floor of my room and not in that place of Why me? Why me? Can anybody just see who I am? Those weren't going through my mind and those weren't the emotions. It was the emotions of like, F you. F you. One day I'm gonna show you that I'm good enough to be able to be in your presence, to be able to be
Max Chopovsky:
Eh.
Shea Hillenbrand:
good enough to wear Hill and Brand on the back of my jersey, to be good enough to represent our family because no one in our family's done anything other than just the norm. Because there's always one person in the family that that when things are going bad and things are going to a place to where things are normal and people are just surviving and there's always one person in the family says, you know what? I've had enough and I'm going to take this family to the next level. And those thoughts were going through my mind at 11 years old. This wasn't just a specific experience. It wasn't just an isolated experience. This happened time after time after time to where I just get emotional and my dad couldn't handle it because he was handling the internal turmoil of himself. And my brothers would just mock me and I'd just sit in my room crying on the floor. So desperately wanting a hug. So desperately wanting to be seen. So desperately wanting to understand. The feelings and the emotions that I was feeling, because I always knew I've been. Set apart from other people, but being set apart from other people for Shea extreme emotions To be able to deal with that extreme sensitivity To be able to process things and be able to do things and be able to understand things So at the place to where I needed to hug the most Just to understanding the most like you know what son it's alright. I understand you're frustrated But let's understand that let's see this and help you articulate never got that I was never in a position to receive that so Whether it was playing basketball or whether it was playing soccer on the soccer field or whether it was playing baseball at school, the same thing just happened over and over and over in every authoritative position I came into. I couldn't handle it because I wasn't good enough. I wasn't seen. And all I ever wanted, my whole life, my whole journey of being an elite athlete, a celebrity Major League Baseball player was just to be seen. And I was never seen.
Max Chopovsky:
That is so hard to listen to because it just makes me want to jump into that story and find that kid in the, in his room and just give him a hug. And sometimes that's all they need. Sometimes all you need is just to give them a hug. And as you said, just tell them it's going to be okay. Like there is a, there's this child therapist that we, follow. And her name is Dr. Becky. And she has this book called, I think it's called Good Enough. And it's a really telling title of the book. And she has this social media presence and she will post these little snippets. And one of the things she posted recently was, you know, it's powerful if you just walk up to a kid, give them a hug and say, hey, I know how hard it is to be a kid. I'm sure it's hard to be a kid. And I did that with my middle one, who is five, one time. And she's also really kind of highly sensitive. And she just looked at me, she was like, thank you. Like, thank you for understanding, you know? It is incredibly powerful. Going back to the story for a minute, let me ask you this. Why did your dad ask you to take all your clothes off when you ran into your room?
Shea Hillenbrand:
And that's a hard place to navigate. And I don't at any point or any way want to. Defile or be great or devalue my father. And through my experience. And through my. Transformation and studying and trying to understand like here I am that somebody who's had everything in the world. I live both my childhood dreams. And I still didn't feel worthy and I didn't have that feeling of freedom on the inside. So through my experience, what you do is when you have a child take his clothes off, you strip his identity from him. And that's it. So nothing else happened. And I want to make that very clear. There was nothing else like, let me see your privates or let zero not even a question. It was just like, how do I make myself feel better? by making somebody else that I have authority over to feel less than
Max Chopovsky:
Yeah.
Shea Hillenbrand:
so I could see value of myself in that situation. And what happens is you don't, and you just hate yourself, and you just go through a journey of life just disgusting. And it's horrible. But I believe solely I know what happened when that happened to me was you strip a child's identity when you do that. someway, somehow.
Max Chopovsky:
Well, you take away their dignity, right? I mean, on some level that's, that's a basic sense of dignity. How was your relationship with your brothers as you got older? Did it get any better?
Shea Hillenbrand:
No, because they haven't done any work on themselves. And they've stayed the same. And what I'm saying is like there wasn't really any traumatic experiences that we went through. But I believe when you become an adult, we've all been wounded. We all have had trauma in our lives. And if we don't address that. What happens is pain not transformed is transmitted some way, somehow. For me, it was very successful in a baseball field because I was able to transmit that pain through competing on a nightly basis, which you need. But off the field, it's a different story. But for my brothers, must be nice to be you, showing up at Thanksgiving. Oh, the superstar is here. Oh, that's cool. I show up on an H2 Hummer. That's $100,000 a car. And it's pimped out. It's yellow. It's chrome. It's like pristine, like everything. And then my oldest brother has an H3 Hummer, which is stock. And the whole family is goo goo gagaing over that. And then here comes my car sitting here. It's like, oh, okay, whatever. So it's just like, how do you process that when you haven't really understood how to work through those things? And it's just like, well, don't you guys see me? So I'm buying these things and flying private jets and, and multiple mansions and multiple things to be able to just try to be seen and try to understand that if I just have this I could hide behind this object with my fear. my fear of not being good enough, my fear of not being able to see who I am. So my older brothers is just, oh, we want our kids to say that their uncle plays Major League Baseball, or, hey, can I have this, or hey, can I have that, or whatever. So our relationships have always been. Like the word that comes to my mind right now is a quasi. They're not bad, but it's not like, I don't know how to really have a relationship. I didn't, you know, I know now with my wife, Kristen, as you said in my story, she's really been the blessing in my life that I've always needed to be able to understand how to. Stand in my value and understand that I am worthy of somebody who loves me unconditionally and believes in me for for me. It has nothing to do with what I did. That's very difficult to go through as a person who's reached a status of success that very few people get is like people don't want to get to know you for who you are. It's always what you are. And that's why I said on top of the world and crack at home runs and Yankee Stadium and on ESPN cash and million dollar paychecks. And I don't feel seen like
Max Chopovsky:
Yeah.
Shea Hillenbrand:
how could you not feel seen in that situation? So yeah, that's powerful.
Max Chopovsky:
You know, I was wondering, as you were talking about your brother pulling up in the H three, have you ever thought that maybe he got that car because he felt in some way inferior to you because he wasn't the one playing major league baseball and to him, this was kind of a small victory he could have over you.
Shea Hillenbrand:
Yeah, that's possible. It's something that's unfortunate, because my oldest brother, Brian, he went to a professional umpire school. And he was a top umpire in the minor leagues. And his wife, he met, made him quit. So she's really done a number on him and his kids and put a wedge between him and our family. So that is a possible thing.
Max Chopovsky:
Let me ask you this, Shea, as you think about the story you told, what would you say is the moral of that story?
Shea Hillenbrand:
The moral of that story is, it's funny because I did a therapy session probably eight months ago and the therapist said. Find your place, a safe spot. A safe spot that you could take your nine-year-old self, 11-year-old self. So you take a young child. It could be a beach, it could be wherever it means, wherever it might be. And he says, whenever you get it, let me know. And I said, I got it. He didn't get a chance to finish. I said, I got it. He's like, well, where would you take that nine-year-old Shea? And I said, I'd take him in the batter's box in Yankee Stadium in front of 40,000 people. He's like, what do you mean? And I was like, yeah, that's the only place I felt solitude. It's the only place I felt sane or an escape from the internal turmoil that I was going through. And I would be able to protect that nine-year-old Shea in that environment because I mastered that mindset at a peak performance to be able to understand and leverage and rise above that pressure of being in that spot where very, very few people would be able to do that. But. at that point in time in that batter's box in Yankee Stadium in front of 40,000 people, I would look in them in the eyes and say, I see you. And it's going to be okay. That's it. It's going to be okay. You will get through this, it's going to be okay. And if I had that said to me, or if I had that somehow difference in how I viewed myself.
Max Chopovsky:
That's an interesting perspective. I wonder if. you had to go on that journey to truly arrive at where you are now. In other words, stronger, more self loving and more open. Or if you had not gone through that, if you had really have had such a, such a powerful character arc, you know.
Shea Hillenbrand:
100%. And I'm a guy that thinks neutrally. I am a believer in God. And not one point in time of my journey that I blame God, not one point in time my journey. It is what it is, right? I can't change it. The experiences that I went through. So I can't I don't invest any energy, time or effort to Try to what if this or what if that or man, I wish I would hear or that the time of energy and effort I invested into that was to Change my perspective of How my story played out?
Max Chopovsky:
Mm-hmm.
Shea Hillenbrand:
Looking back if I had the support that I thought I needed There was a very good chance I wouldn't have weathered the storms and be able to rise above the pressures at the highest levels of my profession of being a professional athlete because very few people can even comprehend what a player goes through to be able to show up every single day to play Major League Baseball because it's unlike any other sport we play every single night. So those stories, those emotions that pain. Some of that stuff, I think, was the main corporate for The main not not culprit but the main ingredient for me to get up every single day and drive and strive Towards something that feeling of not being good enough
Max Chopovsky:
Mm-hmm.
Shea Hillenbrand:
I think was a really good And I think it's a common thread against a lot of very successful people of That feeling of not being good enough. I think that to be perceived in two different perspectives, right? I think the vast majority of people, 97% of people have that same feeling, that same perspective of not feeling that I'm good enough and not being seen. And they use that as an excuse to refine those limited beliefs in their head to hold them back and say, you know what, life just passed me by. And then living with regret as they look back on their life as they get older and say, I wish I would have. Because I speak on stages around the world, and I coach hundreds of people, and it's a common thing. So I think it's just something inside yourself inherently to be, OK, how am I going to use what I have to be able to fuel me towards whatever goals or visions or dreams I aspire to achieve? But there's one thing is you're not going to tell me I can't play Major League Baseball. Everybody else laughed. Everybody else fell off the wayside. All my friends were just like, I don't know what y'all are doing. I'm going to play Major League Baseball. But if I had that vision and that, that idea of being set on I'm going to play Major League Baseball, but if I didn't have that, whatever is going through your side, who knows if I would have been
Max Chopovsky:
I
Shea Hillenbrand:
able
Max Chopovsky:
mean,
Shea Hillenbrand:
to stay in the game.
Max Chopovsky:
the not being good enough is a blessing and a curse. It's a blessing because you're always striving for more. I struggle with some of that as well. You're always striving for more. And that's the positive. The negative is no matter what you achieve, it's never going to be good enough by definition. And so you're always, you're never going to be at peace, right? That's the challenge. If you think about that story you told. why was that one, why was that the story you chose to tell?
Shea Hillenbrand:
Because there's so many emotions involved with that that stood out over. Um, the majority of the other stories that I went through. Um, And a lot of me leading up to this, I didn't want to tell it. Because I don't want to shed darkness on my father. Because he's just a victim of these stories that we tell ourselves. And When my father passed, I reached down and kissed him on the head. And I said, I'm going to use my voice to change the world in a way I can father. And it's interesting at 40 years old to have that perspective towards your father. When my whole life, I hated him. I hated him. I'm at the 2005 All-Star game. I have my entourage there. I have everybody there. And my parents are at the top deck of the stadium. humiliating themselves when I didn't invite them. I cut them out of my whole career because of those stories that I told myself, the narrative that I told myself about this story. And that's where the power lies. And that's the message that I wanna convey, if I may, is true resilience doesn't come from bouncing back to where we were. That's what I thought playing major league baseball. If I just bounce back after this at bat, if I just bounce back after this failure, if I just bounce back after this experience, if I just bounce back after this, when I get sent to my room and I'm sitting there crying, if I just bounce back after getting kicked off my junior high baseball team, my high school baseball team, my junior college, I got kicked off all my baseball teams because of that experience in my bedroom at 10 years old, 11 years old. So we always think if I just bounce back and if I just get back in the game, if I do these things, we don't bounce back because we have neuroplasticity and whatever you wire together or fire together, there's new neurons in our mind, in our brain. Through that experience, however you interpret and communicate that experience, it's going to form a newer version of how you perceive the future. So it's all in a story. You tell yourself about that story. And like I said at the beginning, the beautiful part is, is you're able to. change that story, you're able to rewrite that script, you're able to understand a different perspective, but we just have to understand that when we do that, there's feelings and emotions that a lot of us don't like that make us uncomfortable, that you have to go through to be able to rewrite that story. And the power is in that, the power is in your perspective.
Max Chopovsky:
Yeah,
Shea Hillenbrand:
I should have
Max Chopovsky:
you
Shea Hillenbrand:
been
Max Chopovsky:
have
Shea Hillenbrand:
a hundred
Max Chopovsky:
to
Shea Hillenbrand:
million dollar baseball player.
Max Chopovsky:
totally, totally. And that's what makes it such a powerful decision. And you have to go through the darkness to get to the light. Let's talk about storytelling for a second. If you think of some of the best stories you've heard, and I know you've heard many, what in your mind makes for a good story?
Shea Hillenbrand:
It's all in the pit. It's all in the pit moment. It's all in setting the stage with somebody. Because I love movies, I love storytelling, I love studying this stuff. And I love telling stories from the stage and just being able to reach into people's souls and challenge their perspective and their truth of how they view the world. I did it yesterday in social media and I made some people mad. And OK, I get it. But I'm trying to challenge your perspective of your truth of how you view the world. And the way you do that is sharing your pit. The way you connect with people and get credibility with people is sharing the pit, those parts of your life that are dark, right? And
Max Chopovsky:
like the pit of your stomach
Shea Hillenbrand:
hey, a
Max Chopovsky:
you're
Shea Hillenbrand:
left-middle-league
Max Chopovsky:
talking about.
Shea Hillenbrand:
baseball. know the pit of the story the pit of your journey. So it's like the valley of your journey, right? So the pit of my journey is is leaving Major League Baseball leaving $50 million in the table, and then walking away, leaving everything in the career like like what drives you to do that? Well, pain and resentment and hurt and feeling numb. And there's a lot of things that do that. But good stories come through the depths of your soul. And I hear a lot of people tell stories in there. And when they tell stories, it's like they're resonating at, you know, they're like a surface level because they really haven't really processed through the truth of understanding of what's led them to where they are. And it's how you share that story with. with the energy that you convey and the vulnerability and the pureness of who you are, it just really resonates with a lot of people
Max Chopovsky:
Hehehe
Shea Hillenbrand:
and gets them to a position to where they can really challenge. their truth, because that's what storytelling is about, right? Ultimately, you want to challenge somebody's truth. And the only way you can challenge somebody's narrative or challenge their truth of how they are is through a narrative. I can't just say, hey, here's five steps to do this. Here's let me teach you four things of how to hit a baseball. Well, what do you mean? Let me tell you a story. Because people love stories, right? And then like
Max Chopovsky:
Yeah.
Shea Hillenbrand:
you were like we were talking about before is like stories is bring people together. It's just like, whoa, you experience that. Wait, wait, wait, wait, you, you were on top of the world and I watched you on TV and, and wait, wait, you woke up in the morning like saying the F word because you hated your life and you went to bed pondering your purpose and wondering if you had value in who you are and, and living in quiet. Yeah. That's the beautiful part of story is being able to own your story. Right? and being able to share that with genuineness. But from a place of where that story or that wound in that story is like a scar. It's healed over. It's not still opened. It's not still raw. It's not still to the place to where it's like you just throwing up on people. And they're like, wait, wait, wait, dude. Like, chill. So we got to get to that place, but the true essence of that vulnerability, if I'm talking about that narrative that we tell ourselves about our story, that's the foundation of healing. We got to be able to heal that wound in our soul before we're able to tell our story. But the only way you can discover that wound in our soul that we're going through, because we're all wounded, is to be able to understand your story. So many of us just sweep it under the rug because it's something that we're ashamed about. It's something that we have resentment in. I mean, there's not very many people that have messed up more than I have. And if I really sit and think about some of the stuff that I've done, or a lot of the stuff that I've done with my actions and the ability to, I've burnt every bridge in my life. I've done so much damage throughout my story. But the beauty of it is owning it and accepting it. the power of your story is being able to just share the truth and being vulnerable. And that's what people really want. And that's what I think is lacking a lot nowadays with social media and
Max Chopovsky:
Yeah.
Shea Hillenbrand:
all these platforms
Max Chopovsky:
Couldn't agree
Shea Hillenbrand:
that
Max Chopovsky:
more.
Shea Hillenbrand:
we have. We're lost, we don't feel seen. And if I could help you feel seen by sharing my story with the depths of my soul to resonate at a higher energy. Because there's so much buzz out there to try to get you to challenge and audit. Where am I? What do I really think about myself? Who am I? And what do I want? And once you answer those two questions, it just opens up a whole other world that
Max Chopovsky:
percent.
Shea Hillenbrand:
I never thought would be possible with where I am right now. And I so desperately tried to seek as I was climbing the mountain of Major League Baseball.
Max Chopovsky:
Yeah. Well, I have to say for, uh, not just for yourself, obviously for your kids, for Kristen, for everyone, uh, that you're now helping, whether in training sessions or from the stage, um, I'm glad that I'm glad that you came through it on the other side, um, that does it, man. That
Shea Hillenbrand:
Thank
Max Chopovsky:
does
Shea Hillenbrand:
you.
Max Chopovsky:
it. Uh, Shea Hillenbrand. Thank you for being on the show. And. being vulnerable. I appreciate it.
Shea Hillenbrand:
Thank you very much for the opportunity, buddy.
Max Chopovsky:
for sure, man. For show notes and more, head over to mosspod.org. Find us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon, wherever you get your podcast on. This was Moral of the Story. I'm Max Chopovsky. Thank you for listening. Talk to you next time.